A song about threesomes.

Really, now. Really.

I'm really not a prude by any stretch of the imagination, but GOOD GOD LADY. Have some freaking artistic integrity, jesus CRAP. I do quite genuinely believe it's possible to do 'sexy', without resorting to lyrics like:

Three is a charm
Two is not the same
I don't see the harm
So are you game?

It's just so... so PUERILE, and OBVIOUS. Plenty of other female artists pull off similar themed songs, but without resorting to 'LOLOL LET'S HAVE SEX'. Lady Gaga for example! Or hell, even Christina Aguilera's Dirrty wasn't quite that blatant. And it was called DIRRTY. WITH TWO Rs. Also, BEYONCE. GOD HOW I LOVE BEYONCE.

But yes. Just... ugh. I know Britney didn't ask to be a role model and what have you, but her whole vulnerable ass-waving 'I only exist for some guy (or guys!) to DO me' trip just pisses me off. Grow some class, man. There are other women in the music industry that manage to be sexy without giving away the whole damn farm.

Oh, and they also don't sing through an Autotune all the time, what the HELL Britney? I swear she never used to suck this much.

...aaaand I think this rant is done.

OH and on an unrelated note, I think I have a girl-crush on Florence from Florence and the Machine. Weird.

AGH. So I've been working back at my old job for the past couple of weeks, preeetty much full-time and yesterday my manager pulls me in for a 'word'. I naturally assumed he wanted to give me a bollocking for some ineptitude or other, because hi, it's me, but apparently no- he's giving me a promotion. Which basically means 20p an hour more (try not to spend THAT five pounds all at once at the end of the month) but in exchange he wants to see me 'command the floor' more and actually know shit about menswear.

On the one hand: yay money and job. On the other hand: I have so much Dickens that I have not even BEGUN to read for my final year of university, I need to start writing a play to send to a theatre and get produced so I can actually do this writing thing for a career and somehow in all of this I need to finish my GODDAMN Seth Gecko app sometime this karmic cycle (I can't seem to write apps anymore, what is wrong with me?) and tag back everyone at Taxon ever because I play... a zillion people.

Speaking of which, Joss Whedon WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK I can't believe what he did last issue to my characterization. Xander and Dawn??? Xander and Buffy maybe??? I'm just praying Buffy doesn't decide she's in love with Xander, because if she does then I'd have to either A) just never ever update them , which is a possibility anyway or B) drop one of them at Taxon, an idea which makes me weep, but no I cannot play two halves of a pairing- well, depending on how Xander and Dawn pans out. That's assuming they ever address it, because the comics do love to just drop shit without any kind of explanation. I'm still wondering what the hell is going on with Riley and Twilight and Buffy's secret visits to see Riley in impractical dresses, frankly. IN CONCLUSION: my long-standing ideas about platonic Buffyverse relationships, why do you have to destroy them with a wrecking ball?

...and I believe I have now moaned, bitched, whined and ranted to a high standard on a number of subjects, so I'm going to stop.

1. Rewatch Dusk Til Dawn so I can play Seth Gecko at dustdevils , and basically come up with a fleshed out backstory for him, adapting things to suit the olden day times thingy and suchlike.

2. Finish watching Ashes to Ashes so I can get a handle on playing Alex Drake again at Taxon (even though she seems to be coming back to me pretty easily, which is a cool and pleasant surprise), possibly maybe depending on what Jane says on the subject.

3. Finish reading Dead Until Dark so I can get my Sookie mojo going for Taxon and also decide whether I'm going to play her from the show or the books or a freaky combination of both idk idk idk...

4. Do a bunch of hideous dropping type things-- as much as I wanted to I really can't handle playing at Luceti, not just because it's huge (and the format isn't really to my taste) but also because I just do not have the time. Which is a shame because playing Dawn is super-fun and the Buffy there is awesome, but GAH time constraints. Then there's Nico at Taxon, who I for some reason seem to be really struggling with. And then there's dear_multiverse, which I'd love to keep up with, but again, I only have so much time and Taxon is really my priority. I feel like I don't post there enough and then I'm like OHNOES I'm letting people down and then it's all AGH STRESS and yes. I may have to make posting there more of a casual thing, as opposed to an actual commitment.

5. Open posts of some description or another for Mal and Xander at Taxon.

6. TYPE UP that long-ass conversation I wrote between Buffy and Xander and then post it.

7. MODSHIT of any and all kinds.

...bloody hell, I think that might be it.

Why so boring?

LOVE FROM LAUREN.

<3

Possibly the cringiest thing I have ever had to write, self-threading FTW. xD

As if the Buffybot wasn't terrifying enough.

Like.

I'm just incredibly amazed with how awesomely it's going in such a short space of time, so this is just a completely unabashed post of 

OMGYAY

and very little other substance.

THANK YOU GUYS FOR BEING SO GREAT!

<3

Why can't I get Love Sex Magic out of my head?

Seriously.

'I'm on a boat aaand
it's going fast aaand
I got a nautical themed pashmina afghan'

---

THAT IS ALL.

The Junior Christian Science Bible Lesson.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_LNJn0JI0oE

ABSOLUTELY TERRIFYING.

And a puppet talking about how his ex-wife left him for another man and now has a crack habit is both dubious in its plausibility and not suitable subject matter for children.

So. Somehow. THE COMM IS DONE. Currently taking reserves and applications. xD

Taxonomites
Taxon OOC
Taxon Mods

I'm excited like a child who has just consumed ill-advised quantities of fizzy beverages and sugar-coated confectionery!!!

So apparently when you live with two gay guys you develop a real appreciation for the music of Madonna, Kylie Minogue and Britney Spears.

HALP ME.

So I thought I'd make a list of all the characters I have ever played ever for reasons of idk organisation and er... reference? Here we are then:

Current

DI Alex Drake - detectivedrake (Ashes to Ashes)
Ripley Holden - thetalentedmr (Blackpool)
Stewie Griffin - sexypartytime (Family Guy)
Lilah Morgan - scruplesmoi (Angel)
Xander Harris - demonmagnetism (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
Buffy Summers - likeajoan (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
Melaka Fray - halfaslayer  (Fray)
Captain Jack Harkness - notbound  (Doctor Who)

Old School

Spike - big_bad_blondie (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
Cole Turner - springsinfernal (Charmed)
Faith Lehane - drivebyfive (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
Faith Lehane (AU deceased) - acrisisof (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
Tony Montana - mr_montana (Scarface)
Seth Gecko - twister_seth (From Dusk til Dawn)
Cordelia Chase - cordie_btvs (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
DI Sam Tyler - the_lawman (Life on Mars)
Madame de Pompadour - madamep (Doctor Who/Historical!)

Vaguely inbetween

Lila Tournay - vampiretrollop  (Dexter)

WOW.

Woooo let it never be said again that Lauren does not post in her journal, because she does.

POSTY POST POST!

:D?

1: HOW GOOD IS THIS ICON?
2: HOW GOOD IS THE USERNAME vampiretrollop ?

How come they have to be all madly regional and stupid? It's not like the good old days with videos, you never had to have a special video player, but noooo. BLAH. I want to buy Season 2 of Dexter so I can decide whether I want to play Lila, CRAZY PYROMANIAC STALKIN' METH ADDICT LADY.

Ah well. Patience is a virtue and etc etc etc.

ok I think I'm menopausal. I just read that Obama won the elections and I fricking CRIED. And he's not even going to be my bloody President.

Also after that I watched Gordon Brown's little 'well done' speech and LAUGHED because he's so strange with that chin thing he does and he looks like he hasn't slept for ten years and woe is our country with him as the Priminister......

THE END.